Thursday, August 30, 2012

Fat Kids In Liverpool T-Shirts

What is it that makes the little fuckers so determined to not see their next birthday?  If they're not jumping out into traffic they're falling of walls or running face first into a lamppost!  The dad in me really wanted to check to see if he was alright, the Manchester United supporter in me wanted to just roll on the floor pissing myself laughing*

* To be fair his own dad was also creased up laughing, well right up until the point where the screaching started anyway.

Friday, August 17, 2012

This Is Why Google Is Fucking Evil

See last post for context.

Porsche, Range Rover Or......

When you're a dot com billionaire how you get around is very important.  Me, I've always chosen to fly below the radar, first of all opting for the bus.  Then when the bus became more expensive than running a car (40k for a fucking bus driver, no wonder!) I decided to inherit the wifes old Rover.  What a beast, complete with the dodgiest wiring this side of Chernobyl, windows that didn't work and the sort of bubbling rust that would make the Titanic jealous. 

But all good things come to an end and so it was with the Rover, it was time for the knackers yard and time for me to splash some of that cash on a quality vehicle.  I never knew it would be so hard to pick a car.  When I was younger I would just go for something fast, sticky and stupidly expensive to insure.  That is where I started the search, from hot-hatches (I'm too old), to my dream Porsche (too young for my mid life crisis), to the practical Range Rover (great for towing the boat...cough...twice a year, but our drive is too small and the wife would want a bigger house ;)), to a Van.  I really really wanted a van to the point where I went to look at a couple but there was just always that nagging doubt of extra road tax, I'd probably use it for carrying stuff twice a year and what happens if I'm on taxi duty for the daughter and friends?  Bugger.

So after weeks of scouring adverts and going to look at things that I always want straight away and then change my mind after hours of deep thought later on do you know what I've settled on?  A Ford Fiesta.  Cheap to insure, cheap to run, it's practical enough for 99% of my day to day stuff.  It is a "nice" car.  Nice.  A nice car.  Fucking hell sometimes I hate me!