Thursday, November 29, 2007

Muggle me this . . .

There is an eighth Harry Potter novel due to be released tomorrow. Written by a talented graphic artist/writer chappy (George Lippert) and written by him for his wife and daughter (both avid fans of the Potter series) featuring the son of HP - and prolly the rest of the offspring.

James Potter and the Hall of Elders' Crossing is an online book which, so far, features some pretty good webby work. Along the lines of Muppet babies, it'll extend the Harry Potter universe and opens up the world to the inevitable deluge of fan fiction (fanfic). Unfortunately, JK Rowling has requested that there be no porno versions (referred to as 'slash' fiction, apparently - as in Buffy/Xander, Buffy/Spike, Xander/Spike . . .).

The Potterverse is ripe for sequels, thrillquels and $$$quels - but it'll be all in the reading, I guess. Give a story a few chapters, if your hooked, then wha-hey. If not, it's just a delete from your bookmarks.

And for all you rampant, froth-mouthed Harry Potter haters out there. Just suck it in, OK. You have either read 'em, and get it. Or you haven't, and don't.

That Ginger One From Girls Aloud

Wife: (Whilst flicking through crap celeb mag) Come and have a look at this...quick..come on

Me: What, are there boobies on show?

Wife: No! Look it's the ginger one from Girls Aloud looking nice

Me: Bullshit, it must have been photo-shopped

Wife: What, look.... told you so!

Me: That's definately been shopped, she's got no freckles!

Wife: They can't do that can they?

Me: Watch this...




Lose Weight In Photoshop (makeover) - video powered by Metacafe


It's amazing what they can do these days for ugly munters.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Simple, Addictive & Fun (for 10 mins)

http://members.iinet.net.au/~pontipak/redsquare.html

My high score so far is 17.676 secs

Street Heritage Music Festival Petition

Not a lot of things really happen in the Isle of Man except sporting events. As for music, we are very limited and only get the odd has been on their comeback tour.

However last year Street Heritage put on a Music week with loads of top bands, (The Who, Madness, Deacon Blue, McFly, Ronan Keating, Paul Carrick, Robin Gibb, The Strangers, The Sugar Babes to mention a few).

It might not have been the best Music festival as it’s the only one I have been to, but at least they did it. They put their money where their mouths are and had a go. In fact they lost ¾ million pounds last year hosting the event.

Anyway, to cut along story short they wanted to host it again this year and the next few years to recoup some of the one of costs that wont have to do this year.

They asked the Department of Tourism for some assistance, but they refused.

Anyway, there is a petition on their website site.

Go visit and please sign.

http://www.streetheritage.com/

Here are some over views:

http://www.iomtoday.co.im/news/Peel-Bay-Festival-is-cancelled.3521335.jp

Karma and the balance of life

I pretty sure I’ve mentioned this before, but I am a big believer in Karma, and what goes around comes around, and that life balances itself out.

Whenever I’ve really been in the shit, “life has provided”.

Well I’ve hated my new IT Consultants job for the last 6 months, and I have been so close to just walking away, except for the fact I have a wife and kids and mortgage.

Anyway, a Job came up in the Government for a Department I used to work for many years ago.

In the course of applying for the job and successfully getting it a couple of things have happened to me to balance out the good karma of getting the job.

Good things:
Getting new cushy Government Job
Gemma Atkinson in a bikini

Bad things:
3 year old dropping a paint tin in the back seat of the car, and the lid coming off
Losing my work Blackberry Pearl 10 days before I leave, so I know have to buy a new one out of my own pocket and give it to work (£200 out of pocket)

Both these bad things left me despondent and gloomy for a few hours, but I soon realised that without them some other Government slacker would have got MY job.

I love life at the moment, and I think this is going to be the best Christmas EVER!

Is Manx Telecom rubbish?

Now's your chance to test your connection (instead of screaming at the PC and throwing coffee at the cat) with the Gadget shows latest initiative.

Test your broadband speed and send the results to the show and hope that they pick out Manx Telecom as a poor provider of Broadband. Unfortunately - having been driven from MT's service through frustration and annoyance - I've done the test with the Wimanx connection. Not too shoddy, either.

Monday, November 26, 2007

Lost

Would you believe it, with 2.5 weeks left of my current employment, I've lost my work Blackberry.

Of course it isn't insured and now I have to buy one out of my own pocket to give back to the company.

So if anyone has a Blackberry Pearl 8100 that is unlocked and they don't want it (any condition as long as it's working), give me a shout.

Espically those of you that read this and might work in the telecom's industry, I'm "sure" you know who you are!

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

1 reason to like the civil service

Our comrade in pints, the elusive 'No One Really', has managed to blag his way into a cushty government job with all the wiles and wit that he could muster.

Congrats, fellah, and here's to hoping this bloggasm will be updated a little more regularly once you've got yourself a sweet corner office with an intray of useless papershuffle.

Thursday, November 08, 2007

Reason 4,158,965 Why I Hate The IOM Civil Service

Have a look at this job advert and see if you can spot what they actually want:-
http://www.gov.im/isleofman/VacancyDetails.aspx?id=2335

Give up? What they are actually looking to do is give the current HR Director (Lesley Keenan) a great big pay rise. You see that post used to exist but after a very expensive review the post was not seen as neceserry (after all the Chief Exec gets paid mega bucks and has a large support department as it is). The bloke doing the deputy job was quitely moved of to another government department and that role was gone.

It looks like now they are bringing it back, which wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't entirely written with only 1 person in mind. That £80,000 job description has been written for only 1 person, the current director of HR in the DHSS and it fucking stinks. A department which is pleading poverty giving one if its top earners another big pay rise (with more yearly increments) via the back door.

So reason 4,158,965 why I hate the Isle of Man Civil Service, sneaky bastard job adverts designed to give more money to the already over paid and generally shite management.

Why I hate the Co-op

Fifteen fucking minutes, fif-teen fuck-ing min-utes to buy a pint of milk! What is it about the Co-op that attracts all the weirdos and shit-for-brains? I only wanted some milk whilst I was passing. It was quite, only 1 person in the queue in front of me. I should have trusted my gut instinct (he looked like a bloody mentalist) and walked away but no I hung on in there, turns out he only wanted a top up for his mobile phone. Unfortunatly he only had the wrong amount of cash to pay for it and that he didn't know his mobile number, or really how to use his phone. Cue 5 minutes of fumbling and a 10 minute conversation whilst he phones somebody (presumably another mentalist) to find out what his phone number is. When he finally gets his number the slighly less stupid mentalist that the Co-op seems to specialise in hiring has no idea what to do anyway so has to call for help.

For fucks sake, next time I'll go for a run out into the country and find a cow to milk , it would be quicker.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Halo 3 Killer

I was playing Halo yesterday afternoon with my three year old on Big Team Battle, when I was cut down in the middle of the battle field. As my lifeless body hit the ground, my son jumped up and said YES ! I killed someone, my first kill. Are you really proud of me Dad?

Of course I am Son, as I read the subtitle that I had been betrayed……

Bitter sweet moment.

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

To good to be true?

After Burma put on a wonderful display of Monks vs Police earlier last month - with a kick ass attitude and bumper stickers saying 'The Dali Lama does it for Democracy' - now the Pakistan public have gone one better and trumped that match-up with their own superb 'Lawyers vs Riot Police'

1000 Lawyers (with a sprinkling of Judges) take to the streets to litigate the arses of Paramilitary police. Is it just me, or is this a Monty Python sketch, complete with swinging briefcases and gavel wielding wigwearers gone bonkers.

Just waiting for the new crop of Lawyer jokes to hit the net. You can catch up with the lawyerly world right here.