Oh! It’s been a Long Time.

I haven’t put pen to paper for a while, mainly because I couldn’t think of anything worth anybody reading.

Last Friday 4 of us went to see James Bond and what an excellent film it was. One cried off going for drink afterwards as he had been rather drunk at a Rugby Dinner the night before. But three of us managed to make it to the Piano Bar. Now the trouble with this Bar is that there is no “Last Order’s”, it stays open till everyone goes home. I was under strict orders not to come home before 11.30pm as my sexy wife had the girls round for food and wine. Anyhoo the three of us are sat there righting the world and talking loads of shitte, when Paulie B notices it’s 2.30am. Bugger me! I’m off home he says. Mike & I decide to finish our drinks and then head off home.

Meanwhile Paulie B had gone for Chips, Cheese & Gravy and the found to his dismay he didn’t have enough money left for a Taxi. So he wanders in to town to find a cash point and then takes another hour finding a taxi, eventually falling home at 4.00am.

Mike and I walk past my house and I suggest to Mikey that he comes in and phones a Taxi, to which he snorts at the idea and starts to run off. I feel compelled that he take my generous offer and take chase shouting at the top of my voice that he cease and desist and come use the Telecommunications device in my humble abode. Obviously he’s taking none of that and runs away. Dejected I walk the few meters back up the road Oblivious to the fact that I had been screaming at 4.00 in the morning in a previously quiet residential area.

Michael made it all the way home, and ran out of gusto in his front garden, where he need rescuing from his catatonic state and brought to bed by his long suffering life partner.

I undressed in the toilet leaving all my clothes on the floor, got in to bed, farted and fell asleep.

Excellent Night.