1. England football fans are fucking idiots. They are acting all cool like they're not expecting much but then at the first sign that the team isn't a sack of wank* it's the usual "we're going to win it" shit. Football isn't coming home, 3 lions on your shirt mean fuck all when you fall over at the first sign of somebody invading your personal space and there is more pass and move in the local girls under 12 team.
2. Nobody in Europe likes the English. That is all.
3. Women and migraines. How come they never have a migraine when it's something they want to do? Oh no I'm sorry, I can't go out tonight drinking because I have a migraine, never heard it. Home early from work? You want to do what with that? Migraines ahoy. Also, men don't get migraines, we just have the odd headache, usually for a reason, that reason being something other than us having to do something we don't want to do.
*They must have been watching a different game to me, other than Ireland they are the worst team in the tournament by a long way.
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